Week 1 of parenthood

Week 1 of parenting an air-breather is over with, and it has been quite the transition. I find that the birth of this child has robbed me of passion in some areas. All I can think about is getting home to see my boy...and sleep. Not that I'm that sleep deprived, but rather all of the thoughts and things concerning the boy just sap my energy!

I have been in and out of so many different thoughts...there are so many different emotions, so many different questions I have. Looking at the prospect of raising this boy, I stare directly into the state of my own sinfulness and rebellion against the Lord. Knowing what I know about myself, I honestly think that I would never trust someone like me with a child. All I can say is like Paul, "Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord."

I suppose that this is the reason why even parenting must be centered on the Gospel. I recently listened to a lecture by Tim Keller in which he said something so profound. Most people think that there are only two ways to live - our way (or according to the world) or God's way. Actually, Keller says that there are three: 1) Irreligious - that is, our way, rejecting the commands of God 2) Religious - keeping moral commands and using them to procure our own righteousness 3) Gospel - realizing that our righteousness and security comes from the finished work of Christ on the cross.

So many people think that 2. & 3. are the same, but they are so different. I realize the tension when I think about how parenting needs to happen. Does my son have worth in my eyes because of what he will achieve? for him? for me? Is he loved because he is a huge income tax deduction? because of his looks?

The question comes back to me: am I loved b/c I'm a good dad? Will God bless me more as long as I discipline him well and serve my wife well through it? No, Calvin is loved because he is in the image of God. And one day, I pray, he will realize that the Savior died for him and realize the extent of God's love. I am loved because of Christ, not because of my parenting... What a huge relief!!! What an inexpressible hope!!! This is my greatest assurance and my strongest joy. Thank God for the Gospel...

On another note, here are some more pics...

Nala and Dad peeking in on Calvin


Beautiful mom and beautiful Calvin


Our friends, the Schulte's came by with Joshua - only two weeks apart from Calvin!

Our neighbors, Courtney and Josh and Brody came by as well.

Like Nala, Calvin LOVES baths...

...and eating!

Several firsts...the collision of two worlds

We had several firsts yesterday.

1. Calvin has been pooing real stuff now (no more of that tar-like, sticky stuff straight out of Spiderman 3). In fact, he shot out a blast as we were changing him. Like father, like son I suppose.

2. We got rainbowed!!! As I was changing him, he decided to water the playpen, our bed, some blankets. He didn't get dad, however, I did use my hand to block the flow to prevent over saturation.

3. Calvin and I had some serious meaningful time. Singing and staring...

4. Calvin had his first bath!!!

5. Calvin and Nala had their first real introductions... Nala will just come up and sniff him whenever he cries. She will respond in a maternal way whenever it seems like Calvin is in distress. It's really quite sweet. And then she'll start barking if Calvin goes on for too long. Calvin will then get really quiet and stiff like a rabbit who things a predator is near. It's quite funny - must be a fight or flight response. Nala has been so good throughout this whole deal just being where we tell her to, and constantly wanting to be around - just like a good dog.

Here's some pics of the days events...

Nala meet Calvin...err...Calvin's feet..."No Lick!!!"


Papa and son...catching some zzzs...


Calvin preparing to hit the road...in his sleep.

Happy Feet 2

At first, Calvin didn't like his bath...or maybe it was the fact that mom and dad were taking photos and video while he was nude!


But then, like a good jedi knight, he settled down and felt so good...


And fell asleep in papa's arms. (Note: just like mom, he sleeps with his eye slightly open.)

Silence is golden...

The first two days of having Calvin home were quite the challenge! Eating every two hours and being up was tough for Sarah and my mother-in-law. I think I've had it relatively easy as they've been sleeping in the master bedroom, and I've been all around the house. I'm so grateful.

However, last night, Calvin slept for a good deal and even now this morning, he's out. All I want to do is watch him as he sleeps. Even though I've got to prepare a sermon, a lesson on textual criticism, and get things in order for several other events, all I can think about is my little boy and how tiny his hands are. Every night I get on my knees and pray for him at his crib, asking for grace for one more day to enjoy him.

For the better part of the morning, Calvin and I just stared at each other as I sang him a medley of songs ranging from "How Great Is our God" to "Great is Thy Faithfulness". It was the first real meaningful time spent between father and son, and I pray the first of many.


Well, here's one pic until I get the other ones posted...

Calvin and Grandma getting to know each other.

Homecoming...the prince has arrived!

Sarah and Calvin were discharged yesterday (yippee!) And we broke in the carseat and base unit in the Pathfinder. It was such a weird feeling knowing that my beloved son was in the car. I was so alert watching my speed and other cars...trying to protect my son at all costs. It really makes me think about Rom 8:32...

On another note, it's amazing how suddenly all of these baby stores and clothing shops pop out to me. I took Dave to the Aurora Premium Outlets to visit the Nike store, and I was stunned at the number of child stores that I had never seen before - Carter's, Gymboree, etc. It's like when you buy a new car, then suddenly everyone's driving your car...go figure.

I went back to work today briefly, and all I could do was look at Calvin's picture in my phone and feel drowsily loopy. I guess I need to get used to this feeling of being dizzy all the time! Nala's had this dazed look on her face trying to figure out what she did wrong to keep her from certain rooms now. She's been amazing though!!!

Well, here are some more pics to enjoy (at gomo's request)!

Calvin didn't like his carseat at first.

But then he chilled out.


Calvin's 'gangsta' face.


The Cote family came to visit.


So did Aunt Jane!


And the Sampsons...


And the Nickerson's!!!

Thanks to all of you for the love and support you guys have shown. It means so much! Keep praying for mom's recovery, Calvin's sleeping habits, and ultimately Calvin's salvation. We love you guys!

You want pics? I got pics...

I know so many of you want to see some pics of Calvin, so enjoy!!!

Calvin enjoying some sleep (post 'snip-snip')


A few hours after birth...


Happy (but tired) mommy, grandma, and baby

Proud parents and baby

Tired mom and the ever essential birthing ingredient...Chex Mix.


That's all for now...see you soon

The calm after the storm...

Well, after a brief passing out incident early this morning, mom and baby are doing just great. They were moved to a private PPD room at Alexian brothers in Elk Grove Village, room 165. You are welcome to visit as long as you don't have any cold, flu, or other communicable disease. Also, visiting hours are from 11:00-8:00 pm. They asked us also to inform you that children under the age of 12 aren't permitted, so we'll have to catch you students in a few weeks, but I know Sarah would love visitors. Mom should be coming home on Monday by noon! If you want to call, you can try my cell phone, but signal comes in and out. Ok, blessings and see you soon!

Thar he blows!!!

Ladies and gentlemen,

May I introduce you to Calvin Edwards Lee! Calvin was born at 1:22 am on July 8, 2007. (Jen, you were a minute off!!! Prize will be forthcoming!!!) He weighed in at just under 6 lb. 4oz. Very little crying...and momma delivered au naturale with no pain medications! I can't believe it, and Sarah does not cease to amaze me by her strength, her will, and her determination. All of the nurses and the midwife were amazed at how fast he came out, and the fact that even when he had a shot no crying.

I am so amazed at this gift of God! Sarah and I are also blessed to have had so many messages and so many prayers from you folks out there. We can't wait for Calvin to meet you and be influenced by you in the way we have been blessed by your friendship and love.

Calvin saying hello to the world. As you can tell, he doesn't really mind nudity.

More pictures to follow shortly!

Soli de gloria!!!

Across the great divide

The biggest concern the midwife had this afternoon was that Sarah wasn't effaced, nor was she dilated at all. Penny, our midwife just came into our room at 11:21 pm and did a cervical exam. GOOD NEWS! Sarah is almost 100% effaced, and 3 cm! Thanks for praying! She is now officially out of pre-labor and now entering into active labor. This is such a relief. The hardest part is over. Sarah has been amazing because she's done all of this without an epidural or any medication. What a stud. If it was me, I'd be crying mommy and asking for my teddy bear, but no, she just breathes and bears it. Don't mess with her cause she will tear you up!

2 more cm and we are more than halfway there.

Come on...big money!!!

Enter stage right

At 8:20 pm, we received a new guest into our room...no, not the baby, but my mother-in-law! She took the first flight she could get on to come out and be with Sarah and me (mostly Sarah). Meanwhile, the contractions are getting even more intense! It's a crazy feeling sitting here listening as Sarah moans in pain through each contraction. There's nothing I can do, but pray and keep looking forward. In the background, we hear the gentle and rhythmic thumping of our son's heartbeat...surreal to say the least.

In one of my more emotional moments, I find myself on the verge of tears constantly as I think about how good God is to me. I would never trust myself to raise a child and steward a young soul in this world. What a gift of grace that He would entrust me, bless me...I am overwhelmed with thankfulness. Even as I write this, a song by Sara Groves entitled, "He's Always Been Faithful to Me" plays, and I am speechless. Thank you, Lord.

On a different note, Dave and I went to a Chinese restaurant right across the street to grab a quick bite. The restaurant is called PeaPod, and it has some special meaning. Two weeks ago, Sarah and I had the last of our childbirth classes. We visited the restaurant, and the owner was so friendly, yet gave us space. I told him that I would come back when my wife was in labor for some food. When we came in, he recognized me and greeted me so warmly. He also celebrated with me with this gift
...a bottle of champagne in a chinese gown. How cool is that. Thanks, Sam.

Well, we're still chugging along. Much more pain now, much more intense emotions...no turning back now!!!

Calling all bets...

The pitosin's in...and now let the contractions begin!!! I'd love to hear bets on the date and time you think the baby will be due. Here's some interesting facts to consider...

1. Sarah's water broke on July 7, 2007, that's 07/07/07.
2. We've been admitted to the hospital, room 7.
3. There's still time for a 7:07 delivery.
4. We're watching the AT&T championship, and K.J Choi just had three birdies in a row to go -7.

So, what's your guess? There will be a prize for the lucky winner who gets the time and date correct!

Stage 2...

We're at the hospital right now and Sarah's water has definitely burst! Unfortunately, she's not having contractions, nor is she dilated, so it looks like we will have to forgo our hopes for a natural birth. They will begin inducing in about an hour with a shot of pitosin. Sarah's a bit disappointed, but we've had some times of prayer acknowledging God's sovereignty and provision thus far and forward going. We'd entreat your prayers for us during this time. Pray for a dilated cervix!!! (I know, probably one of the most unusual requests ever, but definitely a need...)

I'll keep you posted. Also, Sylvia's a bit bummed and miffed that Dave is here to experience this all and she isn't. We miss you Sylv!!! But here's a message from Dave.

Stay tuned until the next update!

7-7-07...

Well, my buddy Dave's been visiting and we had a great weekend planned - I was going to preach Sat. night and Sunday morning, then Dave and I were going to drive out to Cog Hill and play #4 Dubsdread, the course where the BMW Championship will be played in September. I've been waiting 1.5 years to play this course...(Note the use of the past tense).

At 9:20 this morning, Sarah felt a trickle of water, like peeing without the pressure...her water broke!!! We've called the doctors and now we're waiting. She hasn't had any contractions, but I know that my family's been praying that the baby would be born today. Of course, all of my family, the minute we told them the water broke replied, "Do you know what today is? 7...7...07! The luckiest day of the year!" We'll see if the baby comes today. All I know is that we're scooting off to the doctor's in about 30 minutes!!!

Stay tuned!!! (I'm so excited, I feel like a giddy schoolgirl...)

P.S. After confirming with Sarah that she is indeed going to have this baby this weekend, I called to cancel my tee time. Apparently, you have to call 48 hours to cancel a tee time. I wasn't within that, but I called anyway. Here's the conversation...

M: "Hello? Yes, I have a tee time on Monday at 6:50. Last name's Lee. My wife's water just broke, and I'm having a baby! So, I can't obviously make my tee time!"

Amanda (from the course): " Ohmigosh...Well, congratulations! I've cancelled your tee time."

M: "Congratulations on cancelling the tee time or congratulations on the baby?"

A: " the baby..."

M: "Thanks!!!"